I’ve been to a few funerals. I’ve noticed, where people are genuinely missed, nobody talks about the things the deceased did. Nobody talks about their money, or their academic achievements, or how successful they were at their job.
When people at a funeral talk about those things, almost nobody is crying over the deceased being gone. The deceased isn’t missed. There’s very little grief.
At funerals where people are truly grieving, the conversations are very different. People talk about how much attention the deceased spent. How much the deceased gave. How much time was spent and effort given to serving others; serving family, serving community. How much they’re going to miss having the deceased in their own life.
Nobody cares about what you’ve done. Everybody cares about how you make them feel. That’s why The Golden Rule is the gold standard.